Dating Advice for Very Tall Women by a Shorter Woman
I’m short compared to very tall women, at 5-8, but I have some dynamite dating advice for you with my very unique perspective, because I’ve always wanted to be at least six feet tall!
Are very tall women best at giving advice to tall women for meeting men? Many tall women do have sensational advice about meeting men.
But if you’re a tall women, would you want advice from another tall women who hates being tall?
How on earth can she help you?
A tall woman needs input from either a very tall woman who loves being tall, or — a not-so-very tall woman who would LOVE to be as tall as you! And that’s ME!
I’m 5-8 but wish I were six feet. This makes me no more odd than a woman with a B-cup bra size who gets breast implants; a woman with brown hair who goes blonde, or a skinny woman who dreams of having curves.
Because I wish I were very tall, I can bring something to the table when it comes to very tall women meeting men.
Besides, when you get right down to it, it’s all about self-confidence, and any smart woman — short, medium or tall — will know this.
Feeling diminished because “all the men like the short girls?”
Suppose “all the men” also liked the blondes. Would you feel downtrodden because you have brown or black hair rather than blonde?
Of course not! The fact that you can change your hair color doesn’t necessarily play into this, either.
It’s just that for some reason, when men prefer shorter women, this really eats up some tall women, because you know very well that if 95 percent of men preferred women with a different hair color than yours, you probably would not change your hair color for this reason.
Well, maybe you would, but many women absolutely wouldn’t even think of it.
What if most men wanted overweight women, and you’re thin? Would you get depressed over being fashionably slender and start stuffing yourself with pork chops and brownies? Of course not!
I know that most men like to see breasts on a woman. But I wear an A cup. Am I miserable and despondent over this?
Of course not! Some men are breast men. I leave it at that. I accept that.
And you must accept that some men, maybe MOST men, prefer a woman who’s shorter than they are. Instead, focus on a physical trait that most men LOVE:
Do you have luscious lips? Beautiful hair? A glowing complexion? Shapely legs? Nice breasts? A nice butt?
I know I will never catch a breast man, and most men are breast men, in that very few men actually look for women with A-cup breasts.
BUT SO WHAT. I’m not the least bit upset, because my type of man is a LEG man! I will flaunt my legs to get a man. Flaunt what you are proud of.
Shutterstock/Doronin Denis
A tall woman can still have a great pair of legs! She can have enviable muscle tone and complexion as well.
She can have a great smile (which many men prize), and then there’s the whole personality and attitude thing.
Would you be drawn to a man who slumps and hangs his head?
Women often list self-confidence as a required trait in a man. Likewise, why would a man come your way if you’re slouched and trying to appear less tall?
This tells him you are not confident. This is a real turnoff to men. If you stand tall and proud of being tall, a man will see a strong woman with confidence and charm. Self-loathing is one of the ugliest traits.
Adorn your body.
Go all out with the hairdo, the jewelry, the clothes, the high heels.
But the moment a tall woman slouches and sends out those vibes of, “I hate being tall,” this will send men running in the opposite direction.
If you’re having trouble meeting men, it’s not because of your height in most cases.
Yes, some men won’t look at a woman over 5-6. My brother is 5-11 and I can tell you right now that he never looked at a woman over 5-9. This is his right.
He married a woman who’s 5-6. But likewise, I bet many tall women have strict preferences in their men as well!
Right? He MUST be this and that, right? He MUST be handsome, right? He MUST be slender, or have a full head of hair, or broad shoulders, or a hairy chest, etc., right?
If 100 men won’t come near you, being tall might explain why 10 won’t come near you.
The remaining 90 won’t come near you because you hang your head; you slouch; you exude low self-esteem; you’re too quiet; your body language says you don’t like yourself; your walk and mannerisms say you hate yourself.
And maybe it’s because you have brunette hair, and a few of those men want only a redhead.
Liberate yourself, put on the high heels, throw your shoulders back, make your presence known, and see what happens.
Lorra Garrick has been covering medical, fitness and cybersecurity topics for many years, having written thousands of articles for print magazines and websites, including as a ghostwriter. She’s also a former ACE-certified personal trainer.
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Top image: Freepik.com
My Daughter’s Very Tall: How to Raise Her to Be Confident?
How your very tall daughter feels about her height will determined by YOU, her parents!
She will internalize how you feel about her height; be careful what you say.
I’ve read postings by very tall women on a tall women’s site. Some are heartbreaking, and some are from teen girls and adolescent girls.
When a girl feels like a freak because she’s very tall, this means that her parents or primary caretakers have failed to teach her to embrace her height. It reflects trouble in the household.
Tyra Banks, the famous fashion model, was ridiculed to the point of tears when she was a kid, for being very tall. Is it a coincidence that when she was six, her parents divorced?
I can see the lack of family stability here, contributing to feelings of insecurity in a confusing world.
Such a child will go to school not very confident or feeling secure. This child then becomes a focal point of mean kids and bullies.
If there is an outstanding physical trait, it becomes the object of the teasing. The child then learns to hate that trait and feel different, or like a freak.
My brother and sister-in-law have a 3-year-old daughter. The doctor says that the girl is taller than 97 percent of kids her age. She’s as tall, or taller, than the 4-year-olds she plays with. She towers over kids her own age.
Now, get this: Her parents, especially her father, are very excited about this. With this kind of attitude, I’d be shocked out of my pants if my niece grew up feeling like a freak about her height.
My brother is very sports-minded and wants my niece to be an athlete. Not that he’ll pressure her to play basketball against her will, but he will encourage her to love athletics.
The girl’s parents are average height, so nobody knows where the height is coming from.
But he is so excited about this. The maid of honor at their wedding — my sister-in-law’s best friend since childhood — stands six-one.
Thus, the girl will get only positive vibes from her parents regarding her extra height. And from me as well.
What kind of attitude would this little girl have, if her parents were going into this with a “Oh no, I hope she doesn’t get too tall” approach? What if their mindset was, “Dammit, she’s going to stand out. Kids are gonna be so cruel to her. Why does this have to happen to OUR child?”
Imagine the damage this would bring to my niece’s body image. First thing my brother does when he gets home from work is scoop her up and spend time with her.
She is truly Daddy’s girl. She will have a very strong male figure in her life. He never goes out with the boys after work. He comes straight home: a true family man.
I don’t agree with all of their parenting methods, but the big picture is that I foresee my niece having so much self-assuredness built into her, that being very tall will never be a thorn in her side.
Because this preschooler is destined to hold her head high and exude self-confidence, nobody at school will think to taunt her about her height.
Think back to when you were in grade school or high school. Suppose there was a classmate with purple hair.
Now, suppose you knew full-well that this kid loved her purple hair. She swung it, styled it, talked positively about it.
No matter how different it looked, and no matter how mean you felt one day, would you ever make fun of the hair color? I doubt it.
You’d sense it was a lost cause, because you’d know ahead of time that this girl loves her crazy purple hair.
It’s the same with height. When a girl learns to love it, other kids will know this, and it will not be a focal point for ridicule. Kids often are what their parents think they are.
Lorra Garrick has been covering medical, fitness and cybersecurity topics for many years, having written thousands of articles for print magazines and websites, including as a ghostwriter. She’s also a former ACE-certified personal trainer.
Encouragement for Tall Teen Girls Who Wish They Were Shorter
Tall teen girls are beautiful, but some struggle with height issues. They will be empowered by what these tall women have to say!
I interviewed four tall women: three of these confident tall women are 6-2, and the fourth is “just under” 6-2!
If you’re a tall teen girl struggling with height issues, allow these confident women to share their wisdom with you.
From Wendy Merrill of California, 51, 6-2. Wendy owns WAM Marketing Group and is author of “Falling into Manholes: The Memoir of a Bad/Good Girl,” which has a chapter called Size Matters where she discusses being a tall woman.
When I was younger, there were no athletic role models for tall women. I was always a tall, gawky skinny girl, but when I grew 6″ in eight months around seventh grade, I surpassed everyone in my school, including most teachers, and certainly felt like a freak.
I was self-conscious and developed an attitude about my altitude that would plague me for years. That something was WRONG with me, and that ultimately I was not lovable.
Of course there were many other factors besides my height that played into this, but I focused on the fact that I was taller than everyone, and became infected with a way of thinking that could never be satisfied no matter what I did. This all changed when I changed.
Not a day goes by without someone commenting on my height, but today I take it as a compliment.
I had to learn that I am the only one that will be with me, 24/7, for my whole life, and if I didn’t learn to accept myself and adjust my attitude … well, then what? Walk around feeling less-than just because I’m not average?
In the end, it wasn’t finding the taller guy, or not wearing heels or wearing heels with a F-you attitude to hide my shame that changed my life.
It was about practicing radical self-acceptance and gratitude. The result? I’m comfortable in my own skin.
So now, I LOVE it when I meet other tall women; it’s like I’m part of a very exclusive club, rather than feeling like a freak because I’m outside the norm.
Yes, I am defined by my height in the world at large, and that gives me power. I can either use this power for good (loving myself) or for evil (hating myself). So what’s it going to be? What feels better?
Do I want to be miserable or do I want to make the most of what I have? I love the definition of happiness as wanting what I have, not what I don’t have, so all you tall teen girls out there who hate being tall?
Hating your height will not make you shorter, and even if it could, it won’t make you happy!
From Stacey Martin, 35, “just under” 6-2, senior marketing executive, Ohio
God made you tall and you should try and use it to your advantage. I find that being tall in the business world is an advantage. I have been told that I have presence in the room.
Since I carry myself well, I come across as confident and assured. People will look up to you if you carry yourself tall.
When I was in high school and the tallest girl in my class, I did have some issues with my height.
My tall friend and I would hang out together and talk and laugh about our height. We once talked to our basketball coach about this and how we didn’t date much and it was hard to find a boy to date because most were intimidated by us.
He said something that stuck with me. He said, “You may not be the girls they are after right now, but you wait until college and beyond, the boys will not be able to stay away.”
I can’t say this entirely came true, but he really made me feel like I had such potential and that the boys my age didn’t know what they were missing.
I think from that point on I embraced my height. Another girl I knew in high school was very tall and very attractive.
However, she walked with her shoulders hunched over. I looked at that and felt sorry for her because she looked so sad and almost unnatural.
I didn’t want to look that way. I made a conscious effort to keep my chin up and come across as if I was in charge.
This was a very deliberate decision for me. I knew my height was part of who I am and it was always going to be part of my identity.
I now like the fact that I stand out from the other women in this world because I am one of a few women who stand as tall as I am.
I don’t just fade into the woodwork. There are many men out there who love tall women. My husband is only 5’9”. Focus on all of your positive attributes and you will shine.
From Kristina Weise of NYC, a public relations professional, 28 and 6-2.
Sports definitely helped because I was with other taller teen girls and I had a team behind me, to support me, and make me feel that my height was ALWAYS to my advantage.
If teen girls do not feel comfortable with their height, and are not inclined to join a sport, I suggest working on their posture, working to gain confidence, and noticing that people who ask “how tall you are” comes from an intense wonder — and often jealous — perspective.
Do you see short girls on “America’s Top Model?” No way.
There are also studies that suggest that taller people are more successful and make more money — use it to your advantage. You cannot let words break you down.
If boys are intimidated by your height, that’s on them, not you. Most men love confidence — despite height — so above all else, be confident.
Gain confidence in the way your height alone brings attention to you — and that’s not a bad thing.
Work to accentuate your angles, feel good in the clothing you buy, do not hide your body.
Being tall gives you an automatic spotlight into many social scenes — and it’s best to smile and go with the flow.
Some teen girls complain they never get ANY attention — take those that ask about height as either a way for them to open dialogue with you — or more attention than any of your other, shorter pals are getting.
From Sabrina Sampson 28, 6-2, finance student, Milwaukee, WI
I would tell other tall women and teen girls to embrace who they are as a woman.
True, we can do nothing about our extreme height, but we can let others know we are confident in ourselves by smiling and being friendly.
It is not easy but we need to accept how our bodies are made. We are blessed to be able to walk and breathe!
We need to focus on what we do like about ourselves and emphasize that. We need to tell ourselves that no one will appreciate our height if we don’t.
We are wonderfully and beautifully made to inspire each other. Smile the next time someone makes a comment about your height and say, “Thank you!”
Lorra Garrick has been covering medical, fitness and cybersecurity topics for many years, having written thousands of articles for print magazines and websites, including as a ghostwriter. She’s also a former ACE-certified personal trainer.
When Men Make Mean Comments to Tall Women in High Heels
How DARE men make rude comments to tall women wearing high heels?
Are they begging to be spit on their head or what? A tall woman has every right to sport high heels!
But there do exist many men who have the nerve to spew unkind words just because a very tall woman is in high heels.
How do I know this? There’s a website for tall women, and many tall women post comments and share their experiences on this siste.
I was actually amazed at the number of postings from tall women who report that men can be very mean-spirited when it comes to spotting a tall women wearing high heels.
I’m only 5-8, so I’m not tall enough to get much attention when I wear high heels.
But then again, I don’t wear high heels on a regular basis. I’m a tomboy and prefer athletic footwear; I don’t go clubbing or to parties; and I work out of my home.
Thus, my opportunities to dress up are quite limited. But when the occasion arises, I don four-inch high heels, like during my recent trip to Las Vegas. But what if a woman is naturally six feet or 5-10?
The postings on the tall women web site are typically from women between 5-10 and six feet, when it comes to wearing high heels, though some postings are from even taller women. Below is a posting that I copied and pasted, word-for-word:
5’11” Renee wrote (November 13th 2008) I would just like to say thanks to everyone who is so positive about being tall.
I have never worn heels in my life before, but I’ve just bought a pair and am trying to work up the confidence to wear them this Saturday!
The only thing I’m really scared of is the mean comments by guys but all your comments have really helped!
I’m always slouching, not consciously but I think it’s just because when I was younger I just got use to it. This weekend I’m going to wear my heels, stand up straight and keep smiling! Xoxo.
If men make mean comments when you wear high heels, then get revenge by continuing to wear the high heels and standing tall, an IN-YOUR-FACE attitude!
I’m sure you, as the tall woman, were probably told that men who make mean comments to tall women wearing high heels are insecure and immature, and you wouldn’t want to date them anyways.
However, to hear mean comments is kind of like having to hear a fly buzzing in the room. Ignoring it will not make it go away.
Mean comments about your height can be just as irksome as someone coming up to you and poking fun at your skin color, nose, the sound of your voice, your weight or the ethnic sound of your last name.
So what can tall women do?
The trick is to PREVENT the comments in the first place. This can be done by loving the shoes you’re in, and loving the height Nature gave you.
When you truly feel this way and change your perspective, this will be detected by those insecure men who are just waiting for a chance to slip in a mean comment.
If you do not act like prey, men will not treat you like prey.
Did you know that a cheetah will NOT chase after a gazelle if the gazelle just stands there?
But the moment the gazelle takes off, the cheetah’s prey/chase instinct will rule, and the predator will give chase. Humans, too, behave either like predators or prey.
If you prance around and strut and flaunt your tall self in your wonderful high heels, men will either keep their mouths shut, or they’ll compliment you.
How do I know they’ll compliment you? The tall women site also has plenty of postings from tall women who wear high heels, who say the men compliment them in droves.
But you don’t need the tall women site to realize how much sense all of this makes. If I were six feet and wore high heels, I’d eagerly venture into areas dense with men, just to get a kick out of the reaction.
You wouldn’t be able to wipe the huge smirk off my face. I’d be giving them this eye-contact that shouted: I love my height; wanna make something of it?
I guarantee it, NO man would have the spine to make a mean comment that I could hear.
And if they did, as in, “You shouldn’t wear heels,” or, “Don’t you think you’re too tall to wear high heels?” I’d find it funny and amusing, then say something like, “My high heels instantly tell me who all the insecure men are.”
Then I’d give him a sneering, wide-eyed look, and I’d delight in watching him turn pale with humiliation.
Ladies, you’ve got to think of these men as MICE. You can either think of yourself as an insect, or as a CAT. What do mice do with insects? What do cats do with mice?
Play with these men’s minds. Put’em in their place: “I wear high heels so I can see the bald spot on top of your head,” or, “I wear high heels so you can feel insignificant/short/insecure.”
Wear your high heels. Walk tall and proud. Confuse these men. Use attitude and pride to get revenge. Smile and snicker at them; they are mice.
Lorra Garrick has been covering medical, fitness and cybersecurity topics for many years, having written thousands of articles for print magazines and websites, including as a ghostwriter. She’s also a former ACE-certified personal trainer.
Is 5’9 Small for a Man? What Height Is Short for Men?
Many men are 5’9, and if this describes you, maybe you’ve wondered if you’re actually short, or just average, for a man.
This is a fascinating topic, because 5’9 is a “limbo” height: It’s often considered borderline very tall for women, and some 5’9 women think they’re way too tall and refuse to wear heels. I’ve seen 5’9 women slouching.
I’m 5-8 and am very good at estimating the height of people.
As for men who are 5’9, this height is interesting because it’s considered the average height of the American male, yet in some countries, it’s actually considered tall for a man.
Now, 5’9 is considered average in the U.S. because the heights of senior citizens, as well as the heights of short men of particular ethnicities (in which men are usually what we’d consider short or below average) are mixed into the statistic.
The average height of men in the U.S. has also been declared to be 5’10 and even 5’10 and a half.
A man who stands 5’9 in bare feet can easily pass as 5-11 if he wears shoe lifts.
There was a three-page thread on this topic. Unfortunately, the thread, which appeared on bodybuilding.com, is no longer up as of December 2022.
If you’re a guy of 5’9 height who is self-conscious or preoccupied with being taller, you will relate to the following information.
The thread’s OP said he overheard two women, both about 5’4, commenting that a man was too short for them; and he was 5’9.
Several other thread posters blasted these women for being shallow.
It’s been said that if you can’t grow taller, then grow wider. I work out at a gym and there is a lot of truth to this.
A short man who’s ripped with muscle doesn’t as much come across as short in stature.
But a short man with an out-of-shape body (thin, scrawny, paunchy, chubby, fat) definitely more-so comes across as short.
The biggest dude I’ve ever seen, as far as muscle development, is about eye-to-eye with me; not very tall for a man, but Lord Almighty, the size of his shoulders and triceps cancels all of that out.
One thing I can’t resist noting:
When a man comments about how shallow those two 5’4 women are, I wonder if these guys are equally shallow when it comes to dating.
Some men won’t even look at a woman if she’s more than 10 months older than him! This is extremely shallow!
They also pay too much attention to breast size.
So guys, hope you’re not being hypocrites here when it comes to height and dating preferences.
Lorra Garrick has been covering medical, fitness and cybersecurity topics for many years, having written thousands of articles for print magazines and websites, including as a ghostwriter. She’s also a former ACE-certified personal trainer.
Source: forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=121555761
Best Reasons Women Over Six Feet Love to Wear High Heels
Tall women like six-feet+ who wear high heels haveeven been questioned by other tall women as to why they wear the high heels.
And of course, men have been known to ask a tall women, “Why do you wear those high heels? Aren’t you tall enough?”
Are you one of these people who wonders why some tall women wear high heels?
Let me give you a clue: for the same reasons women of “normal” height wear high heels! Can’t tall women have style too?
Can’t tall women find a pair of shoes with high heels to look as sexy or appealing as a shorter woman might find them?
Can’t tall women have a fashion sense? Can’t tall women like the same things as 5-7 or 5-4 women?
Some tall women think they’d look like clowns or ridiculous in high heels.
I hate to say this, but I’ve seen very short women wearing clodhopper high heels, and they seemed a tad off balance with their gait, and I’d be lying if I said they didn’t look pretty awkward in those high heels.
I’m not saying a short woman shouldn’t wear high heels. But ANY woman can look ridiculous in the wrong pair of shoes; and the wrong pair of shoes don’t necessarily have high heels.
Some shoes are attractive, and some are unsightly. But if you walk with good posture, and if the shoes fit comfortably, I guess there’s no such thing as a truly unsightly pair of shoes.
Certain high heeled shoes go very well with certain clothes. And any woman knows that the best-looking shoes have at least a two-inch heel, and often a three-inch heel.
The heel comes with the shoe. What are you going to do if you like the shoe? You’re going to buy it!
Why should a tall woman settle for flats?
Have you ever seen the limited variety of flats out there?
There’s only so much that can be done to flats in terms of making them stylish and providing variety.
More than ever these days, flats come in an array of styles, but the range just doesn’t compare to what you find with heeled shoes.
It’s also a known fact that heels force a woman to have better posture, and provide a lift to the calf muscle.
A six foot woman with sagging calf muscles may prefer high heels to perk up her calf muscles.
This up-lifting effect is no secret, which is why female bodybuilders and female figure competitors wear five-inch heels when they are posing on stage.
It isn’t to look taller; since all the contestants wear these high heels, the shortest women are still the shortest women in the group.
High heels lift up the calf muscle.
Flats come in all sizes — obviously, flats are worn by medium and short women, and if a woman likes flats because she likes flats, thinks they’re cool or cute, or suffers pain wearing high heels, that’s fine. I’m not criticizing that at all.
But a tall woman should not feel she must wear flats because some nimrod out there thinks tall women have no right to grace themselves with high heels. That’s my point.
It’s said there is no such thing as a stupid question. SURE there is: “You’re so tall; why do you wear high heels?”
A tall woman wears high heels for the same reason any woman wears high heels: style, fashion, sexiness, goes great with an outfit, and need I say more at this point?
Lorra Garrick has been covering medical, fitness and cybersecurity topics for many years, having written thousands of articles for print magazines and websites, including as a ghostwriter. She’s also a former ACE-certified personal trainer.
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Top image: Shutterstock/ivan jimenez foto
Tips for Parents of Tall Girls: Building Self-Esteem
Parents play a key role in whether or not their very tall daughter embraces–or despises–her height.
Here are super tips for building self-esteem in a tall girl.
My niece is 12 and pushing 5-6, and she’s not the least bit self-conscious of her height. My other niece, 17, is 5-9 and proudly wears high heels.
A tall woman posted a very disturbing comment on a tall women’s web site.
The site attracts comments from tall women all over the world, and the comments indicate that the tall women who blame their suffering on height, outnumber the tall women who’ve always loved their height, a ratio of about 8 to 1. Are tall women in general, accurately represented by this site?
I don’t believe so. Maybe only those tall women who feel cheated out of being “normal” are far more inclined to post negative comments about their height.
The confident tall women perhaps bypass the site, which (according to postings) usually gets stumbled upon when tall women are googling keywords for clothing or shoes.
This tall women’s site then shows up in the search engine rankings.
Maybe tall women, unhappy with their height, are more apt to click on the link, and then end up posting disturbing comments.
Meanwhile, confident tall women spot the link, but bypass it and click on the clothes or shoe link. Who knows? Below is the exact entry that I found deeply disturbing, copied and pasted word-for-word:
6’1 1/2″ Rachel wrote (October 23rd 2008) –
I’m 22 years old and have always felt like an outcast for being tall. As it is the same with most of us, it was hard emotionally being tall in school.
I was made fun of ALOT and even dropped out of school because of it.
Now I have found a man that embraces my height and we have an 8 month old daughter.
Sometimes I cry because I know she is going to be just as tall, maybe even taller, as me. Her father is 6’3″. I’m not upset about the fact she is going to be tall, I am upset because I don’t want her to go through the torture of being ridiculed in school.
So Rachel dropped out of school because the ridicule at school was so intense. Rachel refers to the school ridicule as “torture.”
Remember the Columbine school massacre? One of the victims was Isaiah Shoels. Isaiah Shoels wasn’t the best-looking boy at school. Plus, he stood only 4-11 and was 18 years old.
You’d think he’d be the relentless target of “torture” at school. But just the opposite was true, according to an Associated Press article that appeared in the April 30, 1999 News Wisconsin:
Classmates enjoyed Shoels so much that they competed to work with him on group assignments, Principal Frank DeAngelis said. “If Isaiah was in the cafeteria, there was a group of people around Isaiah. People wanted to be around Isaiah.”
Other articles described Isaiah in a similar way; he was very popular. My point? Women are apt to blame being tall on why a girl is “tortured” and ridiculed at school.
But height is only a superficial reason. Isaiah’s personality and self-esteem had been locked in place by a wonderful home life that was highly conducive to developing strong self-worth, and as a result, school was a happy experience.
Logic tells me that Rachel’s childhood upbringing was ripe with sourness and negativity, little praise, weak in the emotional support department, and not conducive to building self-esteem.
When a child has no self-esteem, she (or he) will be a bully magnet at school.
Regardless of height. But if they are tall, tall jokes will abound — and this fuels the victim’s hatred for her height.
It’s a vicious cycle. Similarly, if the victim lets it known she hates her freckles, kids at school will relentlessly make fun of her freckles. Bullies at school will not ridicule a kid for a trait that the child loves.
Rachel carries her self-loathing (and misplaced blame — blaming it all on height) into adulthood, and will transfer it to her daughter. She already has; she admits to crying for the child’s future school experience.
The effect this will have on the daughter will be horrendous. Read the last line of Rachel’s post.
That child is going to spend her school years feeling defective and freakish, courtesy of how her mother fears for her. Mum will be crying for her, worried about her, nervous about her.
This will rub off on the girl; the girl will expect to be ridiculed at school, and when a child expects disaster, things have a funny way of working out to fulfill those expectations!
The girl will be scared to death of her first day of junior high or high school (or maybe her first day of grade school), obsessing about her height, anticipating ridicule, and behaving accordingly: head hanging, painfully shy, afraid to introduce herself, etc. This behavior will attract ridicule!
The girl’s thought patterns will have already been established by her mother.
The girl will already feel like a freak long before she enters high school. She will have internalized her mother’s destructive attitude.
I don’t have a PhD in psychology, but let’s face it: This is Psychology 101 ! Rachel is ALREADY throwing pity parties for her daughter!
I hope Rachel and other women like her read this. Women, take note: Kids are masters at picking up their mothers’ anxieties and internalizing them. This is Psychology 101.
Women, do not doom your daughter from the start, like Rachel is doing.
Lorra Garrick has been covering medical, fitness and cybersecurity topics for many years, having written thousands of articles for print magazines and websites, including as a ghostwriter. She’s also a former ACE-certified personal trainer.
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Top image: Shutterstock/Cookie Studio
How to Deal with Thoughtless Comments About Being Tall
Tall women usually have problems finding tall womens clothing.
Cool clothes for tall women may be a rare find, but the bigger problem faced by many a tall woman is the inability to embrace their height, such as “Camilla,” as posted on a site for tall women that I came upon.
Apparently she was a teenager at the time of her post, but many tall women share her misery.
Camilla is 5-10, but keeps trying to convince herself she is not a tall woman and is only 5-9.
She’s a sloucher and hates standing on a bus because her head almost touches the ceiling and makes her feel “insecure.”
I’m 5-8 and when I ride the light rail to the symphony, wearing 3-inch heels, I’m craning my neck and standing like a soldier in an attempt to touch the ceiling.
Camilla says people don’t notice her pretty face, but her height catches their eye.
But 5-10 is only two inches taller than me, and I am by no means a very tall woman.
Camilla has tried to put on weight to appear less tall, and hates being referred to as lanky. She says that a “slight comment” about her height will ruin her day.
It’s okay to want to change a body part.
Again, it’s one thing when a woman wishes that something about her body were different.
For example, I wish my skin were naturally as dark as it got when I was a child in the sun all day long.
But lack of a natural tan does not ruin my day nor cause me anxiety or unhappiness.
I wish I were a very tall woman, but I’m certainly not miserable with my current height. I wish my legs didn’t grow hair so I’d never have to shave again either.
It’s okay for a woman to wish things were different about her body.
But poor Camilla sounds like she’s suffering to high heaven. I wish I could have just five minutes with this teenager.
When a teen girl slogs through every day in a heap of depression and unhappiness over being tall, this clearly indicates that something is lacking in the home.
One need not have a PhD in psychology to figure this out.
Either there’s something awry in the home structure (lack of praise; lack of dream-building; lack of affection; lack of positive attention, marital instability with the parents), and/or teens like Camilla were never taught to deal with life’s little hardballs.
Dumb comments are directed towards women of all sizes, even “normal” sizes.
Whether you are a big and tall woman, short woman, fat woman or look like Pam Anderson, you must learn to go through life fielding dumb comments and stupid questions from people.
I’ve had my share of stupid questions and annoying comments from people; obviously not about my height, but about other things.
A person who’s prone to making annoying comments to tall women will make annoying comments to medium women (about other things than height, of course).
But if the comments and questions you get are always about being tall, then at least you can prepare for some witty responses.
In my case, dumb questions or comments are usually unpredictable, so I have to be especially prepared with a witty comeback. Many would argue that I shouldn’t say anything; just ignore the dope.
But let’s admit it; it feels so good to deliver a witty response to a stupid or rude comment!
But when a tall woman gets a comment about her height, it’s a compliment most of the time.
Tall teens may get ridiculed and called names like Green Giant, but tall women usually get nice compliments (though there is the occasional rude question).
Tall women must convince themselves that the following comments are meant to be complimentary:
“Gee, you’re tall.”
“Wow, you’re so tall!”
“Geez, I thought I was tall!”
“How tall are you?”
“You’re as tall as my boyfriend.”
“How tall are your parents?”
“Were you always the tallest in your class?”
If being tall is such a terrible thing, why is height prized in the modeling industry?
And if you think your face isn’t pretty enough to be a model, then take a good look at runway models. Many aren’t all that pretty.
But models aside, if you’re very tall, consider yourself blessed. OWN IT!
Lorra Garrick has been covering medical, fitness and cybersecurity topics for many years, having written thousands of articles for print magazines and websites, including as a ghostwriter. She’s also a former ACE-certified personal trainer.
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Top image: Freepik.com/ master1305
How Very Tall Women Can Fight Back at Rude Height Comments
Many very tall women report that all their lives, they’ve gotten rude or less-than-complimentary comments and questions about their height.
Other very tall women have never experienced this problem, and some of them may even find it difficult to believe that this problem exists.
But for some very tall women, it does. Maybe it’s because sometimes, people just happen to end up being around too many small-minded schmucks who lack social graces.
There was a website several years ago where tall women posted their experiences, and most of the posts were quite negative.
These posts cited quite an array of nasty mean comments from strangers, as well as from coworkers, social contacts and even family members.
Here is one such post, copy and pasted off the site. The post was written by 6-1 “Val.”
I’m criticized for wearing heals, called anorexic (I’m fairly thin) and I’m quite often mistaken for a guy. I have broad shoulders and I’m flat everywhere so I get many comments about my manliness xD
Val needs to re-evaluate her choice of whom she hangs with and where.
She seems to gravitate towards negative pockets of people. Maybe she and those like her grew up in negative households.
It’s amazing how rude and callous people can be!
Very tall women who keep getting fed rude, unkind remarks about their height need to get away from these small-minded people. Dump them like garbage.
Of course, if some of this toxicity is coming from family members, it won’t be so easy to toss them out the window.
But one must absolutely make an effort to limit contact with anyone who ridicules something about their body that they have no control of: their height.
It’s unbelievable that very tall women or even “average tall” women can actually be challenged or even criticized for wearing high heels — even by strangers.
Think of high heels as revenge against the clowns who make derogatory remarks about your tallness. Freepik/lookstudio
I can easily picture these rude people doling out criticisms to shorter women about other features such as hairstyle, clothes, makeup application and who knows what else.
Do you really, really wish to continue associating with people who keep trying to pull you down into their hole? Rid them.
But there’s another way that very tall women can fight back at little-minded people who dare to make unkind comments and criticisms:
Wear the doggone five-inch heels and smile at these people; add some confident clare in your eyes.
Now of course, if five-inch heels aren’t comfortable, wear a shorter heel — it’s always important to make sure a shoe fits properly and doesn’t scrunch up your toes, cause pain or make walking difficult.
These days, stylish heeled shoes are offered more than ever in large shoe sizes by various retailers.
Lorra Garrick has been covering medical, fitness and cybersecurity topics for many years, having written thousands of articles for print magazines and websites, including as a ghostwriter. She’s also a former ACE-certified personal trainer.
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Top image: Shutterstock/ michaeljung
Tall Women Confidence Boosters: Choose Your Best Shoes
Sadly, some tall women hate their height status, totally unaware of just how blessed they are!
It’s amazing how some tall women despise being stared at all the time, yet other women will create “fashion statements” that invite continuous staring, such as tattoos, body piercings, extreme hair colors and provocative clothes.
So why, then, do some tall women hate being stared at?
If I were six feet tall, I’d wear high heels and walk through a crowded area, just to revel in the response.
It would be difficult to keep the smirk off my face, as one person after another stared bug-eyed.
If you’re a tall woman who’s despondent over your height, you’re no doubt thinking that I’m out to lunch with my assessment, because I’ve never been six feet tall and thus, never experienced all the staring.
But I know I’d love it and never get tired of it because, all throughout my growing-up years, I envied the tallest girls in the class, whom, I might add with great interest, WERE NEVER MADE FUN OF.
Plus, there really are very tall women who love the attention they get wearing high heels.
Freepik.com, marymarkevich
The tallest girl throughout my grade school wore glasses and was a straight-A student: a classic geek, and even with that added to the height, STILL, kids never so much as teased her, nor the other tall girls, one of whom was fat.
It’s a proven fact that tall women (who carry themselves with confidence) are more likely than short women to get promoted on the job. Ever see women journalists interviewing professional athletes?
They are practically swallowed up by the athlete and, I must admit, it looks kind of ridiculous, this tiny woman craning her neck up at the big guy, and attempting to compensate for it with a bellowing voice.
Very tall women would have a clear advantage. This advantage would also make its mark in any sales or management position.
Businesses like to hire salespeople (or managers) who create presence.
The shorter woman must work harder to create a presence, and it’s often in the form of an authoritative voice. It also comes in the form of a clomping walk.
Have you ever noticed that many women of average height or short stature, who are in management positions, loudly clomp down the building’s corridors? They are creating their presence.
In fact, the clompiest walkers in public always seem to be short women. I can’t blame them, because, let’s face it, being tall is a huge asset in this world.
As for creating their mark, all a tall women need do is just be there!
As long as she exhibits self-assured posture: no slouching, no slumping, and no ballet slippers! Flats fool nobody, by the way.
And they make a tall woman come across as lacking self-confidence. Flats convey the message that a tall woman is very uncomfortable with her body.
Flats convey the idea that a woman is not her own person.
- Do you really, truly and honestly think those flats are the best looking shoes on the store shelves?
- Aren’t you sick of buying them already?
One of the greatest assets to being very tall is seeing eye-to-eye with most men you ever encounter.
- Why do many tall women find this a negative thing?
- Why would you want to look UP at men? Especially at a man who’s pissed off at you?
- Ever notice that when a man is angry at a woman, he uses his height advantage in an attempt to intimidate her? It’s almost ridiculous sometimes, when men do this. It once happened to me.
I got in an argument with the boyfriend of the girl who roomed next door to me at my college dorm.
Though he was 5-10 (I’m great at estimating heights, and he appeared to be two inches taller than my 5-8), he stood right up to me, and it was so obvious he was trying to exert intimidating authority with his extra two inches.
And there I was, thinking, Gee, I can’t loom over him. Nevertheless, I maintained my spot and refused to retreat, and stared him down. But still, that moment I would have loved to have been six feet!
Very tall women will never become “little old ladies,” because even after age-related bone loss sets in and tall women lose height, they’ll still come out on the tall side.
But me? I’m 5-8 and absolutely dread the day that I get shrunk down to 5-5. At 5-5, there will be nothing I can do to be “equal” to the average man, like there is now: Wear heels.
If tall women really need a confidence booster, I suggest they do a little volunteer work at a hospital full of sick people, who’d give anything to be tall and healthy.
