The “small fat” woman said, “You have to be skinny to wear it,” after I said I liked the midriff outfit and mini-skirt in a photo.
Her response to my comment would’ve triggered many influencers. Our society has collectively become weaker.
Decades ago, this same comment could’ve been made, with far fewer women becoming triggered.
Nowadays, you’d better watch your mouth, lest you send an influencer and her followers off the rails.
I was looking through photos on a computer that the woman – let’s call her Maddelyn – had brought with her.
They were images taken at an arts and crafts fair. An outfit caught my eye.
That was the one for which I remarked, “I like that outfit.” The wearer was perhaps a size 6, maybe an 8 if she was tall.
But by no means was she skinny. Thanks to the obesity-promoting and fat acceptance movement that has swept through Instagram and TikTok over the past 10 years, many women, and even some men, have lowered their threshold for what they consider to be skinny or thin.
The woman below more accurately fits the description of skinny or thin.
Shutterstock/fizkes
Today, a woman 25 pounds heavier at the same height would easily be called skinny by fat activist influencers.
“You have to be skinny to wear it,” responded Maddelyn. She, too, has been stealthily manipulated into seeing a size 6/8 body as skinny.
If a woman is 6’2, then a size 6 would mean she’s thin. What I saw in the image was a build that was in between slender and straight-size.
However, I didn’t point out my perception to Maddelyn. I simply let it go. That’s because something bigger got my attention.
Right after Maddelyn had made the comment, I thought of how any of those fat acceptance influencers on Instagram and TikTok would’ve reacted had they been sitting with us.
I can tell you how they would’ve reacted. They would’ve said any of the following:
- “Who SAYS you gotta be skinny to wear that? If you wanna wear it, then wear it!”
- “No, you don’t have to be skinny to wear that; anyone can wear that if they want. What’s stopping you?”
- “Honey, if that outfit is in your size, then you can wear it. F what others think.”
- “Our thin-obsessed culture says you can’t wear that. Well screw beauty standards. You’d look great in that.”
At first, these statements may come across as super encouraging and empowering.
But look a little closer. They are condescending and invalidating.
If an overweight woman thinks her body wouldn’t look good in a midriff mini-skirt outfit, then she is being reasonable and realistic.
Maddelyn would not have looked good in that outfit; she was what’s considered “small fat” or “acceptable fat” on the so-called fat spectrum that’s been coined by fat activists.
Maddelyn’s response to my remark wasn’t lack of body or mental confidence. It was reality. It didn’t help that she’s middle age and untoned. She knew that.
For someone to contradict her realistic observation would’ve been to patronize her and invalidate her reasonable assessment.
Why should a fat woman wear something that she knows would be very unflattering?
Should she wear it as push-back against perceived systemic oppression against fat people?
That’s a silly reason to wear something that you’d have to continuously force yourself to believe you actually rock it.
A woman should wear what she thinks she looks good in.
And if she’s obese and doesn’t want rolls of belly fat oozing out between a midriff and a mini-skirt, then that’s her right. Leave it be.
But here we have these fat-liberationists who’d try to convince Maddelyn that she has a body image disorder.
No, Maddelyn’s perception is on-point and quite accurate.
But let’s suppose she one day asks me what I think she could do to boost her body confidence.
I’d tell her to start lifting weights. The fat positivity camp would tell her to wear an outfit that shows a lot of skin. Just ridiculous.
Clothes are a mere prop, while strong muscles, joints and bones are for REAL and with you every moment of your existence. You don’t take them off at night. They are YOU.
If Maddelyn ever asked me for dieting advice, I’d give her dieting advice instead of the patronizing and insulting “You’re perfect just the way you are.”
