Here are great responses for stay-at-home moms to fire back at people who ask rude or lame questions.
Stay-at-home moms have a right to be feisty and respond with clever comebacks to rude or absurd questions from “working moms.” So here are some clever responses for all the stay-at-home moms who’ve had it with the outlandish questions and comments.
Rude question: “When your children are older, you plan on getting a real job?”
Stay-at-home mom response #1: “What part about raising kids is fake?”
Stay-at-home mom response #2: “Last time I checked, having quantity time for quality moments and witnessing developmental milestones and wiping my children’s tears and teaching them about all sorts of fascinating things is pretty real to me.”
Stay-at-home mom response #3: “So if I got a job stocking items at Walmart, that would be more real than building character in my kids; putting things in perspective for them when they feel down in the dumps; and having the time to help my kids with science projects, essays and math?”
Rude question: “Oh my, then you don’t work at all?”
Stay-at-home mom response: “Precisely. You see, I have this magic wand. I wave it and it makes my kids’ nutritious lunches magically appear.
“If I tap the wand, it creates a robot that helps with my kids’ homework.
“If I toss the wand and catch it behind my back, a nanny will appear and take care of the kids and clean the house while I watch TV all day.”
Rude comment: “So you must have lots of extra time; can you pick my daughter up from soccer practice tomorrow?”
Stay-at-home mom response #1: “Funny, I don’t recall mentioning that I had spare time on my hands.”
Stay-at-home mom response #2: “Sorry, but I’d much rather spend that extra time at the gym. It’s great to go to the gym in the middle of the afternoon before the after-work crowds get there.
“While I’m keeping my upper arms firm, my kids are playing in the gym’s daycare.”
Dumb question: “How can you spend all day with your kids?”
Stay-at-home mom response #1: How can you spend all day with corporate management, like they really have your best interests at heart?
And all day listening to the drivel of coworkers? And all day with workplace rules? Dress codes? Someone else telling you when you can take breaks? Really! How do you do it?”
Stay-at-home mom response #2: “It’s easy to spend all day with people I love. Do you love your coworkers?”
If the person says, “As a matter of fact, yes, I absolutely do love the group I work with,” then ask, “Really? Would you jump in front of a train to save any of them? I know I would for my kids.”
Dumb question: “Don’t you miss intellectual stimulation?”
Stay-at-home mom response #1: “Are you implying that working outside the home automatically burns brain cells? Tell me, what do you do all day at work – build rockets and research an AIDS cure?”
Stay-at-home mom response #2: “While the kids are napping or eating or playing quietly, I’ll take to reading the latest medical science or classic literature.
What do you read in your spare time? Or I’ll watch an educational show on TV with my kids and we both learn about how things work – shows about animals, biology, science – what do you usually watch on TV? I also take my kids to educational places like museums and arts festivals – where we both broaden our minds.”
Stay-at-home mom response #3: “What makes you think my last job outside the home was intellectually stimulating? I’d put advertisements together on a computer.
“Big deal. My brain went soggy doing that. By the way, would you like a game of chess with my nine-year-old?”
Dumb question: “What do you do all day?”
Stay-at-home mom response: “One day my husband came home from work and saw my two older kids rolling on the lawn in a fistfight, and two of the garbage cans were knocked over with garbage everywhere.
“He went inside and saw food splattered all over the kitchen walls and floor, and dirty dishes everywhere.
“The toddler, face smeared with food, was in the living room drawing on the wall with his crayons. My husband stepped over piles of dirty laundry to get to the staircase.
“He went upstairs and nearly tripped on some toys. He found me in the bathtub reading a book and eating bon bons. He asked, ‘Honey, what in devil’s name is going on?!’
“I said, Dear, you know how when you come home from work, you always ask me what I did all day? Well, today I didn’t do it.”
