Though many childfree couples relish boldly taking on rude questions & comments, others hate this.

I interviewed actual childfree couples to see what kind of great comebacks they had in their tool bag.

Obviously, “Why don’t you want kids” is asked after the childless by choice woman or man announces that she or he does not want kids.

Even people you just meet will ask, “Why don’t you want kids?” upon finding out your choice to stay childfree.

To hear someone say, “I don’t want kids,” produces shock waves in many people. I say, BIG DEAL, so someone doesn’t want kids.

The BIGGER deal is when someone unfit to take care of children wants children! Know anyone like that?

Instead of asking someone, “Why don’t you want kids?” you might want to instead ask a totally inept, irresponsible parent, or someone who’s always griping about her children, “Why DID you have kids?”

Listen to the way some parents speak to their very young children. It’s reprehensible. Emergency rooms get their fair share of battered children. The better question is, Why do some people HAVE kids?

Actual Childfree Couples Offer Clever Responses to Rude Comments


“Not my thing and besides my dog’s allergic.”

“Didn’t you hear? I’m actually due February 30th! I can’t believe no one told you. I’m so excited!!”

“Oh, no one under 14 is permitted in my house. It’s a rule!”

Then there’s the question: Well, what are you going to do when you are old??

“Die, just like everyone else.”

“Hire someone to care for me.”

“Hang out with friends, travel, do whatever I want. The same like now.”

“Pose nude!!”
Lisa Concepcion Giassa
PR Executive, Bergen County, New Jersey

“No kids, no pets, no plants.”
Wendy Manning, 36
PR Professional — client work with NASCAR, Dale Earnhardt, Jr., and Fortune 500 companies
Aurora, Colorado

“When I was kid my mother always told me that when I grew up I would be just like her!”
Joyce Connelley,  Business owner, Dallas, Texas

Irina Patterson says:
I am a family entertainer in Miami, Florida, 48 y.o. and childless by choice.
But why? Why? You are so wonderful with kids, my clients would say
again and again.

That’s why, “I am wonderful,” I reply. “I have just enough energy to love them now knowing I’ll be home soon for total respite.”

I do love kids, it’s true. But I never regret that I didn’t have one of my own.
There are too many kids already who need all the love they can get.
Irina Patterson
Irina – The Russian Queen of Balloons, Based in Miami, Work Worldwide

I’ve been teaching martial arts to kids for over 20 years. My wife is also a martial arts instructor and we’re both often asked why we don’t have kids of our own. My first response is:

“I have 100 kids a day…I can’t imagine having to go home to one more!”
Jim Bouchard, author of “Dynamic Components of Personal Power”

Similar to “Why Don’t You Want Kids,” is: “WHEN Are You Going to Have Kids?”

“We are just going to f*** a lot and see what happens.”
Erin Talbot, New York, New York

I got engaged in 2005. Since that time people have started asking when I plan to have a child.

My response is always, “We’ll revisit that at 30.” Now that I am 28 it is time for me to “revisit” the idea, but I am no closer to a final decision.
Elizabeth Thompson, Media Relations Manager, Atlanta, Georgia

“After I make my first billion.”

“When it stops being illegal to leave them alone for 8 hours a day with a cold bowl of water and a toy.”

“When I can stand to be around a kid or a parent for more than 10 minutes without wanting to either kill them or myself.”
Lisa Concepcion Giassa

Lorra Garrick has been covering medical, fitness and cybersecurity topics for many years, having written thousands of articles for print magazines and websites, including as a ghostwriter. She’s also a former ACE-certified personal trainer.