5 Autism Traits I Blamed on Other Causes Until My Diagnosis

For years I thought these 5 autism traits were normal until I began researching ASD and got my official diagnosis. Or almost normal.

I’ve always had certain internal experiences, as well as external, that from time to time, I acknowledged were rather peculiar.

These were features of myself that I had attributed to “normal” causation.

I now know they were driven by my Autism Spectrum Disorder.

I find this very fascinating – very. You yourself may have a history of similar experiences, having always passed them off as being par for the course for an aspect of yourself that you’d never thought was outside the realm of normal – though possibly near the border.

Five Traits I Never Knew Were Autistic Until My Diagnosis

Actually, prior to my ASD diagnosis, I had been researching autism.

It was during this pre-assessment period that I had begun realizing that my internal and external experiences were likely due to autism.

Rehearsing Anticipated Conversations

I don’t know when in my life this started. All I can say is that it’s been an integral part of my existence.

I did it relentlessly (and still do). The rehearsing is usually inside my head, though on rare occasions it’ll be out loud.

If conversation will likely be at some place I plan on being, I will imagine talking to people I know will be there, usually in the form of answering their questions.

If I don’t know who’ll be there, I’ll make up people – make-believe humans I’m interacting with inside my head.

There’s been answers to questions that I’ve rehearsed over and over and over.

I don’t mean a one-liner, but paragraphs and even lengthy explanations or commentaries, based on the nature of the anticipated question or comment.

There are certain situations that are highly conducive to triggering this rehearsing.

Walking on a treadmill; walking or jogging outdoors; hiking
Resting in between weightlifting sets
Driving
Watching TV (I’ll have to replay scenes that I’ve rehearsed over)
Anywhere I’m waiting (doctor appointment, grocery line, post office)

Pre-autism diagnosis attribution: I’ve always had dreams of being a film actress, since early childhood.

I’d always believed that the very frequent rehearsing – which includes re-enactments of actual conversations plus do-overs of how I’d wished they’d gone – came with the territory of having a lifelong acting bug.

Now certainly, neurotypicals rehearse conversations (e.g., answers to job interview questions), but not to the extreme extent that some Autistics do.

Persistent, unyielding rehearsing is a form of scripting, which is common in ASD.

Special Interests of a Gruesome Nature

“Special interests” refers to obsessions or hyperfixations, often on unusual topics or objects, which is very common in autism.

When I’d gone through a phase of being transfixed on wood chipper deaths (real, not in movies), I attributed this to a natural morbid curiosity.

And many “normal” people have morbid curiosities, right?

I was also once deeply fascinated by shark attacks and wanted to view shark attack wounds, including fatal. Again, morbid curiosity.

All throughout my life, I’ve had many, many interests. But some absolutely stand out; these are the special interests.

This includes one on mangled faces from motor vehicle accidents. My morbid curiosity again.

I’m not saying that autistic people can’t have a morbid curiosity.

But my examples show a fusion of morbid curiosity and special interest.

I’ve had morbid curiosities that weren’t hyperfixations, too, namely, images and videos of vehicular accident aftermath.

Special Interests of a Medical Nature

Having always been fascinated by the human body, I’ve had several intense fixations of a medical nature.

The ones that jump out are comas, schizophrenia, mental hospitals and seizures from head trauma.

Of course I was hyperfixated on these: I’ve always been interested in medicine!

But many components of medicine or the human body have intrigued me without crossing that line into special interest grade.

Aversion to Tags in Clothes

I don’t know the age at which I became aware that clothes came with tags.

All I recall is that prior to adulthood, I’d ask my mother, a skilled seamstress, to “cut out” tags in new clothes.

At some point, I took over the role, because I wanted the tags cut to the nub.

Upon seeing a tag sticking out of someone’s collar, I’d always wonder how they could stand it.

Even tags, that were located at the bottom of shirts where they wouldn’t contact my skin, had to go.

Tags on pillows had to go. I especially hated tags with quality control stickers on them. Ewww.

Tags in wallets, fanny packs and inside sunhats, too, would get snipped out.

I never gave this aversion a second thought, a la “I must be weird for hating tags.”

I assumed many people felt the same way. I never brought up the topic because I just figured it was something many people dealt with.

I now realize that this is an example of a “sensory issue” or sensory avoidance in autism.

It’s also a relatively common one among Autistics.

Overthinking, Overanalyzing

I had always chalked this up to having high intelligence and having an analytical mind.

I never thought it could be a sign of a diagnosis in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders: autism.

I had always prided myself in being so thorough in my assessments of negative situations.

I’ve even stated, “It’s better to overthink than to under-think. Over-thinkers get the job done.”

Certainly, many analytical thinkers are neurotypical.

But in autism, the features of analytical thinking and overthinking are done to excess, resulting in stress (sometimes a LOT) and consumption of time due to these internal experiences.

Overthinking and/or analytical thinking includes endlessly replaying an interaction or reviewing a situation in one’s mind, spending inordinate amounts of time dwelling on the issue, and not being able to “let go” of the issue.

All sorts of hypothetical scenarios may be played out, with the Autist getting quite worked up about it — even though the issue is trite.

Final Notes

If any of these five experiences resonate with you, this doesn’t mean you absolutely must have autism.

However, if you heavily relate to even just one of them, AND you have other traits or characteristics that are common in autism or you’ve always felt different from other people, misunderstood by other people and/or have a long history of feeling you must always defend yourself — it’s time to consider the possibility that you just might be on the Spectrum.

But that’s not a bad thing! It’s high time that autism be fully accepted and acknowledged as part of natural human diversity.