Parents should NEVER discourage their very tall teen daughters from wearing high heels.
Otherwise this sends a very bad message.
If your daughter knows that you feel awkward about her extra height, you’re doing something wrong and it needs to get fixed.
What should parents say when their tall teen daughter wants to wear high heels? Tall teen girls; high heels: Are these a smart or foolish combination?
If your teen daughter is tall, you’ll do a lot of harm by telling her she shouldn’t or “can’t” wear high heels or any heels.
By telling your tall daughter she’s too tall to wear heels, you’ll set her up for negative body image issues, for feeling very uncomfortable in the body that nature gave her, the body she probably inherited from at least one of her parents (i.e., YOU!), the body that she cannot change (as far as height). Don’t commit this huge mistake.
Yes, there are parents who tell their tall daughters they shouldn’t wear heels. This is sad.
Funny, I once wrote about a 5-11 woman who didn’t want to wear high heels, and she griped when her mother suggested she actually buy some high heels as a teen.
The mother gave the teen some loving chastising about how she should be proud of her height.
The teen was 14 at the time and already 5-9. The mother made her put on a pair of high heels and saunter about the store.
The experience transformed a self-conscious tall girl into a tall girl who relished her height from that point on.
A Web site for tall women has a “tall quotes” page where tall women post comments. I copied and pasted, word-for-word, the following post (including typos):
5’10” Bev wrote (December 22nd 2008)
From birth it seems, I’ve been labeled as being tall, extrordinary, modelesque, giant, basketball material, Jolly Green, the tower, and the list goes on. I have, however, never let it get to me.
I took all the comments in stride because I love my height. LOVE IT! I have been taller then every guy I’ve ever dated, every best friend I’ve ever had, and taller then my mom’s entire side of the family (my dad’s side is full of giants like myself of the 6ft and over variety, so we, the species, are not alone).
The reason I love it, is because it makes me unique, and thankfully I have a dad who appreciates that.
He’s the one that bought me my first pair of 4 inch heels despite my mom’s protest that I should not be ‘allowed’ to wear heels at my height.
The last sentence of the post is disturbing; thank goodness this woman had a father who had some senses and encouraged his tall teen daughter to wear high heels.
I’m not saying force your tall teen daughter to wear high heels. And I’m not saying you should nag her to buy high heels.
My message is this: Do not discourage it. All it takes is just one negative comment to set in motion the beginnings of body image struggles.
Many women with anorexia report that their dangerous dieting began after just one comment about their weight from a parent. This shows how vulnerable teens can be when it comes to body image issues.
If your tall teen expresses an interest in buying or wearing high heels, simply support her choice.
Tell her she’ll look great in the shoes. Don’t shake your head or say, “I don’t knowwwww…” or some other negative, like, “Are you sure you want to wear heels?”
THINK…
