Women over 35 who’ve never been married need to stop letting all the clowns out there make them feel that there’s something wrong with them.
According to observations, which he called a “study,” involving never married women, a man concluded that if a woman is still single and over 35, something must be wrong with her.
This man’s excuse for still being single is that he can’t meet a compatible woman who, like him, wants to stay childless. He’s adamant in his belief that never married women over 35 are messed up.
How many never married women over 35 have a psychiatric illness? Okay, maybe you’ve got problems, but how many married women do you know who don’t have emotional issues?
What’s depressing is that indeed, the older a never married woman gets, the more likely that people really DO think something’s wrong with her!
Only a person with primitive intelligence could think that just because a woman is never married, something must be abnormal inside her head.
With all the unbalanced women out there who get married, it’s obvious that emotional stability and mental healthfulness do not guarantee a woman will get married. If any woman is unbalanced, it’s the woman who marries for very wrong reasons or stays in a loveless marriage, even when there are no kids to stay together for the sake of.
I explained to this man that a massage therapist I know has never tied the knot, is in her 40s and very attractive.
This woman’s schedule is booked solid, with a steady stream of people visiting her house and paying $65 for massage sessions, lying on a table while she works on them, spilling details about their personal lives as she puts them at ease.
Her house is immaculate and she’s very health conscious. She makes $125,000 a year; a huge, loyal client base.
Yet, the man believes something’s “wrong” with her because she has always been single. A woman with a significant mental problem would not be able to build and maintain a massage therapy client base as extensive as hers, because to succeed in this business requires tremendous people skills, organization, discipline and an upbeat, cheerful attitude.
What if this women, in a parallel universe, married the man who, when she was 25, proposed to her.
But she married him for the wrong reasons, and stayed married to him. So today, she’s in her 40s and married.
Does this automatically mean nothing can be wrong with her? But in our universe, she didn’t marry, holding out for Mr. Right instead…
And THIS means something must be wrong with her?
Apply this principle to all never married older women.
Do we assume that nobody ever wanted to marry a woman just because she never married? Maybe that never married woman has had five marriage proposals. Maybe she didn’t think any of them were Mr. Right. Does that mean something’s amiss with her mind?
What if in a parallel universe, these women married because they caved to their parents’ pressure to marry?
- Or society’s pressure?
- Or they “settled” because they feared growing old alone?
Marrying for these reasons is not a sign of prime emotional health or high self-esteem. But all a woman need do is marry for nutty reasons to prevent being labeled as a woman who has something wrong with her because she never married!
So people think something must be wrong with the 60-year-old woman who never married. Is anything MORE wrong with her than the 60-year-old woman who’s been married to a maggot for 30 years?
- Or the 60-year-old woman who’s divorced because she was too clueless to realize that her ex-husband was a philanderer or drug addict while she was dating him?
- Or the 60-year-old woman who’s three-times divorced because she doesn’t know a good man when she meets one?
So nobody wanted that never married 60-year-old woman; that’s your conclusion? And what about her 60-year-old twice-divorced neighbor? Maybe nobody wanted HER, either, and her two ex-husbands married her only for convenience or money.
You cannot conclude something “must be wrong” with a woman just because she never met Mr. Right, especially when half of all marriages end in divorce, and many women stay married to men who knowingly cheat on them, men who degrade them, men who beat them, men who don’t love them, and men who ignore them.
I’m never married. When I’m older, will this mean something’s wrong with me? Would I suddenly be “normal” if I married so that nobody would think something was wrong with me?
Lorra Garrick has been covering medical, fitness and cybersecurity topics for many years, having written thousands of articles for print magazines and websites, including as a ghostwriter. She’s also a former ACE-certified personal trainer.